What I Didn't Want....

We have tried to conceive a baby for almost three years. Something isn't working right and I feel that it's me. I had a lot of complications after my son was born due to Mirena Birthday Control.  I had the birth control in for exactly 8 weeks. The doctor removed it due to I was having a horrible hormonal imbalance! I was just completely not myself. My doctor at the time didn't bother to tell me one of the side effects to this medicine was infertility.  Well Ken wants a baby of his own so badly and I feel as a girlfriend I fail him because I haven't given him what he wants. He says he doesn't care because he has two kids such as my kids that he feel are his kids. But It bothers me to want something so badly and can't have it. It's sad that my children have two dead beats as father and supported by their daddy ken who just wants a baby of his own. I could have kids with deadbeats why can't I have one with Ken.

I guess by reading this from the last blog you know that Aunt Flo decided to visit!

That's really all I have to say on this post because well it is saddening to know my body isn't doing what it was made to do! :(


Sincerely  Sadden Today
Diedra

OH Where Oh Where Have I Been?

On August 19th was the last time that I posted a blog entry. OH MY, where have I been.  I know in that I would say come back tomorrow to find out why we are so busy.

Needless to say I never came back until now. I am going to fill you in why not only starting in September but actually as soon as school starts why we are so busy.

August is the month that my friend and I go to Rodeo. Not only do we go to Rodeo but that's when school starts back.  You would think that during the summer we would be busy and at times we are. However, the school year especially fall is when we are the busiest.  Especially starting September.  September 8th actually this year is when Ry's dance year started. (6th year baby!!!!) Not only that but she is at that point in her life in school where she can start playing little league volleyball, cheer leading, and etc. This year she chose volleyball. I mean you can't necessarily beat $20 dollars to play for a few months. Their games didn't actually start until September 19th and they began practices the last week or so of August. So on top of Dance on Mondays for almost 2 hours. She has Volleyball on Tuesday (practices) and Games on Saturday morning. (yes you read that right, on Saturday Mornings.) We also for both kids have had parent teachers conferences already. However, now we have hit the month of October. Tomorrow is October 1st and for us this is when the end of the year becomes one hell of a time.  October especially, are you ready for this??? October 10th, Ryleigh Birthday, October 20th, My dad's birthday, October 24 is a good friends birthday, October 25 is Ken's birthday, and October 26th is my sisters birthday. OY what was I thinking being friends with people in October. HEHE love them anyways.  So from the month of October until December we are short on money always. Between birthdays, trying to save for black friday, as well as buying Christmas in between on top of regular bills. (Speaking of which Ken gets paid tonight and need to budget out bills this week.)  Needless to say that since my daughter is turning 10 and will be in double digits {LORD HELP ME} we decided to throw her a party. She chose the place and mommy and daddy have paid.

Now on to some exciting news. I am going to start VLOGing I feel this is a way for me to blog and be able to capture everything in my children's lives. As well as talking about random things such as you know LIFE!

I only have one VLOG up as of now. I mean I just started.

head on over to https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCkRA5YAUprZgPX-NNX_DqWw and view my latest blog!

Day In The Life Blog???

I love watching VLOGS of day in the life's and just in general of younger moms. Most in which are younger 20s to even teens. I have even questioned even starting my own YouTube channel. (Come back to find out later if I decided to!) however I thought about BLOGGLING a day in the life with pictures tomorrow. Basically a day in the life of a mother close to 30 shown through pictures. Will be neat. Please come back tomorrow or Thursday to see the finally product. Considering tomorrow the first time since school let out I have to get up at 6 am to get kids ready brayden has to be at the dentist at 8:15.!

Again, I am so sorry haven't blogged much. The summer time this year just has been a crazy busy/almost not busy enough boring summer. Make sense? I didn't think so. Not only will I do the |DITL| Blog but I will try and make a separate post on what has really been going on this summer. 

Please take the time to like the blog and share my chaotically crazy life. Please comment your crazy chaotic life as well. Love ready blogs about people's life as well as watching VLOGS. 

Thank you for reading. Love you all. 

Q & A

I have been asked a few questions, whether it be on here or people who have followed me on Google Plus, Facebook or Twitter.  I have been planning to make this post for about a week now. Lord have mercy just about everyday this week something has come up. Not only that but still dealing with the pain from having a tooth extracted. However, there are three questions that have been asked quite a bit therefor I will answer them three now.


1. Does your children's fathers have anything to do with them? 

• This question in a sense is one of my favorites because it gives me a chance to actually explain the situation coming from the person who actually knows the truth.  To answer this question as a simple answer it would be NO. If you would ask their dad's it would be "She keeps them from me."  Do I keep my kids from their dads.  No I have never kept my children from their dads.  My daughters dad hasn't seen her since she was two years old. My son's dad is more of a convenient dad. When it was on his time? However, I have been called every name in the book by both men who have chose to walk out of their children's lives but have no one else to blame but themselves so they blame me.  My daughters dad knows that I live in the same spot that I have since the day that I had Ryleigh as well as my sons dad. Whom my sons dad is prison again. The first time he was in prison we wrote back and forth. He gets out after promising to step up his game. It took him a week to call me after he got out of prison. Then after that phone call which was a decent phone call no fighting, nothing. I hadn't heard from him. I think a lot of that is because he talked to Brayden. When he told Brayden that "Daddy Loves and Misses You". Brayden is smart and knows he hasn't been in the picture therefor Brayden replies you aren't my daddy and I don't miss you! Then asked to speak to his brother. Brayden will tell you his daddy is Ken. Ken has been in the picture for 4 years straight almost, will be in November.   Ryleigh after being with and living with Ken for almost 2 years finally realized and accepted that her real dad wasn't coming back around. She finally accepted after some trials and tribulations that Ken wasn't going anywhere. She began calling him Ken Daddy. 

2. Speaking of Ken, the next question when are you and Ken aka Ken Daddy getting Married? Or do ya'll plan on getting married. 

• Yes, we plan on getting married. we were shooting for this year but not sure if that will be possible because right now Ken has had an interview with a very big company and hoping to get on there. If that happens that will put us back a few months trying to catch up bills. Weddings cost money! However, we have talked about when he does get this better job possibly getting married at the court house then going and having a wedding next year. 

3. Is there a reason you aren't going to hair school anymore? 

• There is a lot of reasons why I am not going back to hair school. Some in which I can't discuss or write about right now. A lot of my decision was base don the fact that students were teaching students how to do hair. That's not at all how that is suppose to work.  Then after figuring and what not until we can get ken a better paying job we couldn't afford for me to go the school that I have always dreamed of going too.  However, I WON'T give it up. Just sometimes, most of the time life happens and you have to pick your priorities. 

Thank you for the questions. Would love for some more questions. 

Hope to hear from ya'll soon! 

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What to Expect...

As I have said so many times before , I am trying to get better at blogging. To be 109% honest I am only human. I am also a very busy human and there's days where I ask countless of times what day it is. I am legally a single mom but a taken single mom. Make sense? Didn't think so but Im pretty sure if ya stay tuned for the next 30 days. You will come along a post by what that means. Starting April, I was going to do this 39 day blog challenge. But there are so many of them I liked, that I am going to add tomorrow and Tuesday along with April. There will be a few I have to change because I don't have that type of social media but for the post part you will learn more about the gal behind her mobile device/computer.  

I am also doing this because they say it only takes two weeks (14 days) to get your self into a solid routine. Although our life is chaotic, we still need some routine to it to keep up with events coming our way. 

Pleaee come back and see what ya find out about me as well as asking your own questions. 

10 Facts About Me

I have had a few people ask what is there to know about me. Just me. I will start by giving 10 facts about me. 

1. I was born July 31st 1985, that means what your thinking. I will be 29.96 on my birthday. Really, that's the new 30.

2. I have a severe case of TMJ. Jaw disorder. To some known as lock jaw. 

3. I am one of those people that will stop in the middle of the road to let and older person, children in general to go across the street. I mean come on common courtesy respect your elders. Children as well being children sometimes get lose from parents and run. I mean in reality I live in a small town. Main road is popping with a post office, store, and even salon. People are always walking across the street. Doesn't take five minutes out of your day to let them by. 

4. Im the youngest of 2. My sister is damn near eight years older than me. 

5. My relationship with my boyfriend has been the longest relationship I've had. Besides my father of course he's the first man I ever lived with and will be my last. 

6. I have 5 friends that consider brothers and sisters/my best friends or both. In which two are guys and I grew up with both of them. 

7. My best girlfriend could give you ten completely different facts about me. 

8. I have a niece that will be 21 this year and a nephew that will be 20. Geez  old. You know it when you can legally watch your niece get drunk. 

9. I went to nursing school and graduated with a high gpa. I couldn't get passed my boards. I may take them again. I have like 5 credits away from a psych associate degrees. I am now in cosmetology school. However cosmetology is something I've alwAys wanted to do. 

10. I want all together 4 kids possibly 5. 

Crazy Life....

It's been extremely busy around here lately. I had forgotten to post about new planner. 

To be honest as busy as we have been I really haven't been able to really dig deep into it. However, I like how the weekly calendars are sat up to where each day says morning, evening, and night.  I did tonight with the handy stickers in the back start me a spring cleaning list. I am bound and determined to get all these clothes gone thru in the next few weeks. My house has never been so cluttered until we moved back into my childhood home. That is because before moving back here and before Ken and I. Ken had lived on his own for more than ten years and had been married before. In them years he accumulated a lot of stuff.  Then we we moved in together in one year of living together, we together accumulated a lot between him and I and the kids.  When we moved to my childhood home we went from a house with a basement to a house without a basement.  Our biggest issue lately though is that I am at school use to be 8-4, but now will only be 8-1:30 (will explain later) and him at work all day. Then on Saturdays this past November and December he worked and I went to school. In this process clothes began piling up. I began becoming overwhelmed and done minimal laundry. Meaning what we needed to survive for the week.  That's where my Erin Condren Life planner came about. I felt once I got it and got my hands into getting organized to fit my families busy weeks. 

The planner was $50 and in reality could be cheaper but it is a good quality, thick. And detailed planner. Therefor the pricing is probably just about right. 

I love the cheetah and the personalization. 

The rings that hold it together are thick metal rings nothing flimsy like notebook metal. 

Over all so far happy with my purchase and will post more in depth later when I am able to take more pictures.