What I Didn't Want....

We have tried to conceive a baby for almost three years. Something isn't working right and I feel that it's me. I had a lot of complications after my son was born due to Mirena Birthday Control.  I had the birth control in for exactly 8 weeks. The doctor removed it due to I was having a horrible hormonal imbalance! I was just completely not myself. My doctor at the time didn't bother to tell me one of the side effects to this medicine was infertility.  Well Ken wants a baby of his own so badly and I feel as a girlfriend I fail him because I haven't given him what he wants. He says he doesn't care because he has two kids such as my kids that he feel are his kids. But It bothers me to want something so badly and can't have it. It's sad that my children have two dead beats as father and supported by their daddy ken who just wants a baby of his own. I could have kids with deadbeats why can't I have one with Ken.

I guess by reading this from the last blog you know that Aunt Flo decided to visit!

That's really all I have to say on this post because well it is saddening to know my body isn't doing what it was made to do! :(


Sincerely  Sadden Today
Diedra

Trying To Conceive

I still haven't figured out what is going on with my internal body, however, it could be a multiple things.  However, my period is usually right with in the longest cycle of the month. Which if you are a woman you know that it can range anywhere between 28-32 days. Well, it came last month on the 10th, and now this month the 10th has come and gone. But the weird part I am 4 days late from my period not starting, but only 2 days past cycle day, which I am on my 34th day.  But the go getter is I have take pregnancy test and they are negative. Such as I have taken a clear blue early detection test.  That one said NOT pregnant! I am like geez, Just show pregnant! Yes, that's right pregnant! Ken and I are trying to have a baby. So things like this give us false hope. It saddens us because we get so excited that I haven't started and then my period either comes or everything still says negative!

However, that's seriously what's going on with my body.

I just wish my body would decided if at 30 it is capable of having a baby or at least conceiving! I miss being pregnant! I miss having a baby around. That doesn't mean I love my children any less!